Queer Nothings

Time had reduced the man to a shrivel; belittling him in every respect, from his stature to his expectations from life. The only striking feature of his general appearance was his long white beard that would have been cause for much stumbling; had he not wisely braided and wound the silver strands about his small self. His equally long and white mane formed a halo about his head. This attracted many locals to him and they hounded him with questions of life, fate and God. He humored them sometimes, only too glad for the company and the food they got along. One day the man who had long since begun to hallucinate, got a vision of an endless tunnel. He decided that it was some sort of divine intervention informing him of some oncoming event of significance. He decided to do absolutely nothing of it as he believed that any such attempt might change his prospects of being benefited by the outcome of that vision.
Thus deep in thought; he sat down in the middle of nowhere (middle and nowhere being relative parameters),    and looked about. He saw a classic case of 'absolutely nothing '.  
'This is it,' he thought. He almost imagined himself levitating as a result of the resultant exhilaration.
Suddenly, out of nowhere he saw a light, brilliant in every respect, especially its effect on its lone observer; that caused
his eyes to be glazed with a glare and a new found warmth crept within him. He paused, expecting something of significance to happen. Nothing did. Nothing, in fact, perceived as something of much profound meaning, was thought by the man to be the secret to life's mysteries.
This in turn led him to the following train of thought;
Only on what I know can i claim my right on;
and I know nothing; likewise
I claim my right over all of nothing.
But then again, everything is merely transcendental and delusional
so everything is in fact; nothing
thus I must be a Supreme Being,
the pervade-r of everything and nothing.
This extremely comforting feeling (justifiable) made him sing in joy of newly found meaning to life.
Whilst in this state of pure bliss he walked, a spring in every step, only to be brought back to reality by the powerful impact of a strong tree bark on his head. He waited excitedly for something to happen because he had read a few books on visions and cosmic travel being propagated at times by a severe blow to the head and a resultant loss of consciousness.
But 'nothing' remained loyal to him, only this time to be welcomed with gross disappointment.
He slid down the tree and sat at its roots in sudden melancholy.His silver locks cushioned his head from the tree's unfriendly bark, when suddenly, when all hope seemed to have diminished, something did happen.
A plump red apple fell on his head. 
The man, being born after Newton's apple discoveries, and being weary after too much thought, ate the apple greedily and fell asleep under the tree.